I had surgery and as I was getting my discharge orders today they told me not to drive, make big decisions or operate heavy machinery. They said nothing about blogging, but maybe they should have.
You see, the procedure I had done today is one that is not usually discussed in mixed company, but somethings you just need to purge and get it out of your system and blame it on the drugs. So I have had some female problems for about a year and it was time to "fix" the problem. It required some "taking-a-look" and "cleaning up" so to say.
I was supposed to do this at the end of month, but my body insisted that I do it right away or risk becoming anemic at a rapid pace. So yesterday after a few calls, my really cool Doctor hooked me up today.
Now, yesterday when I went in for my pre-op appointment my doctor had lost his voice. Laryngitis if you will. Listening to him whisper to everyone was cracking me up. Not that losing your voice is funny, but the thoughts associated with that in my head were. So when I meet with the doc before surgery today, his voice is slightly worse than the day before. Thus, giving my brain more comedy, though not really appropriate comedy. I was all good about keeping it to myself until the anesthesiologist gave me some really good stuff in my IV. (Seriously, I get how people could get addicted to some things. Oh the relief of the worry.) Anyway, so after the good stuff, I couldn't keep it to myself. So you all have heard of the Horse Whisperer and the Dog Whisperer right? You know where this is going right. Yes, I did...... I called him the "Va..na Whisperer". Apparently, I was telling everyone and anyone. And anyone I didn't tell, the other surgical staff did.
So, yes, this gets back to said really cool Doctor. When he meets with the Rocket Scientist while I am in recovery, he whispers, "Did you know she is calling me the Va..na Whisperer?" Of course he is laughing. The RS really laughs and says that he does know that. The doc then asks if that means he can make non-compliant va..na's compliant. Ya.....and I get to look this guy in the eye in two weeks for my post-op. Do you think it's too late to suck all of that back in my head?